HELLO AMERICA!

Hey everyone I've been gone for a while from my blog but I'm back. I've been doing lots of nothing over the winter break, working like a mention in my last post; and shall I say that I am unbelievably happy to be done working for the summer. I think I may never want to work in a department store again in my life from what I've gone through working at a department store for the winter. Anyway besides working this winter I've been shopping NONSTOP! From forever21, Victoria Secret, Target, Charlotte Russe, and I'm sad to say that yes I've become addicted to eBay! But I've passed that stage now I'm officially staying away from eBay. I feel kinda sad though when I think about my winter break and just think of the things I did I hardly did anything and it makes me really sad; I haven't hung out with none of my friends( but knowing me I'm so anti social I'd rather stay at home and lay in my bed listening to music with my t.v. on the fox soccer channel before I ever decide to go somewhere)or do anything memorable like go to China or Germany like some people would have done(those who have the money  for those types of thing anyway) or just maybe even go to a restaurant. It's so crazy to me when I think about my life it's so blah! nothing exciting about it I bet a baby has a more interesting life than me (sad to say). But deep down inside every single time; and I mean EVERY SINGLE TIME I always have this little voice telling me in my head " Carolyn soon you'll love your life, soon your life won't be boring anymore it'll be interesting" so I really think this voice knows what it's talking about so I just hope, pray, and wait! ugh see I try to do a short little blog entry and it becomes a long life story about my dreams and aspirations! WOW! (nice Carolyn)

Boring Day post!

well today is not a particularly fun day today I'm sitting here on my laptop at the moment writing this post and looking out my window that's covered with plastic so the winters breeze wont come through(even though it's winning at the moment) and it looks so gloomy and sad today. So I've decided to stay home from my computer class and do my assignments from home instead of going but around 5 I have to leave to go to my next class to take my final exam and leave, But I also have to make my new schedule for second sem. and I'm hoping they don't stick me with any math. I'm so horrible when it comes to math!
Anyways off of the subject of school-- it seems that  every time I write a post school comes up lol now that tells you how interesting my life is lol!
Yeah but today feels like such a mundane type of day, so OVERLY normal and calm lol! kind of still you know... these types of days I feel so weird kind of like depressed because nothings going on... well not depressed I should say more bored or quite? i don't know...
well I'll talk to you guys (or myself) later lol!
peace&love carolyn!

"choose it" type of music

OK so I wanted to share some music that I have chosen to put on my blog. These are songs that I listen to probably 4 times a week in my ipod! lol. Everyone knows I'm obsessed with Hindi music, and music all over the world! And when I post something I try to put at least 1 song that I have been listening to- to share my love of music. (I feel like I said this before lol)
okay so I know I should do like 8 songs because I haven't done any posts since forever and I feel it will put me back on track so I think that's what I'll do! lol
this is a pic of the songs that are on my itunes that I love my favorite play list!(that I just made today just for this blog)
 Oh yeah I forgot to mention that I love searching online and coming across a song that I have never heard before I love the feeling of finding music from different websites, and blogs, or from other people!
here is one song that I found from looking at fashion videos from a girl who shops at a certain website that I wanted to see, and while looking at the website I found this great song!
song: I GET AROUND JUGGERNAUTS REMIX

 artist: DRAGONETTE

OK so here is my fav. songs itunes play list!

lol as you can see I love Indian music and Nicki Minaj lol

but this isn't the only music I listen to it's the music I listen to every night!

(maybe this says something about me, I have to have been Indian in another life time cause I love everything about India lol)

Random post!@(^_^)@

hello, finally I'm back; and Christmas is dawning upon us! really nothing fun or exciting has been going on in my life recently(typical)but I felt like at least writing something. This is kind of like a free writing because I'm just writing what comes in my head. (lol).
since college is starting to end for me, and everyone is starting to go on break I am going to be working for the winter break so I'm kind of looking forward to it. Well looking forward to the extra cash since I'm running low on that. lol! I really want to fix up my room; it's super small and sometimes I feel that I cant get any inspiration from my room because it's super small, plain, and uninteresting. With the money I plan to get from working I want to decorate my whole room. I've been doing research on what I would like it to look like.  I may post pic's so you can see how small and ugly my room is maybe not though because at the moment it's a total mess.(lol) I cant wait! I want to get a headboard to put candles on as I sleep and books so I can read more often at night which isn't a bad thing; and paint my room maybe a warm color. I'm also thinking about maybe getting wallpaper with the pretty patterns that are black and white. I also want to eliminate as much space as possible because my room is so small. Plan on taking out my dresser and adding nightstands and a vanity stand and pretty storage boxes to put my clothes in for the moment.
But aside from that which is my biggest plan and probably my only plan for the winter (lol) I'm really bored. I've been trying to do more writing in my writing journals to occupy my time but I get so bored easily with it that I find myself ending up laying down listening to music and eating and laying back down and just going to school. I've been trying to find something I can do that's productive but I cant. I really like scrap booking but I find it kinda hard to do (lol) especially with no supplies and no knowledge of what to do and how to do things so I've decided to take up drawing things in my art journal but again found myself becoming bored of that too. Recently I haven't been doing anything in that.
I really want to find a hobby that I can do that I'll have fun doing and can take some time off my hands. I think eventually I'll find something.

Raavan (A. Rai )

The song that I am literally in love with at the moment and I cant stop  listening to and the video is adorable too is Khili Re from the movie Raavan. The melody and the vocals are just so warm and calming and to those who love Hindi movies and music you will love this song and movie its excellent. You have to listen to the song and watch the video and I will assure you that you will definitely want to see the movie.
so here is a link to the video Khili Re:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skeLbK83WSk

The video is so adorable please check it out; you will really love it!

love how Africans have Pride!(culture)

Today is 11/13/2010. Yesterday I went to UIC in Chicago to see my best friend preform and I really wasn't expecting what I saw there. I was so amazed and it made me love even more that I am African American and that deep down I'm happy to have roots in Africa(even if I don't know exactly where in Africa I am from). When I went to this performance there was a fashion show, a DJ, a freestyle(I think that's what the boy was trying to do) and mostly performances from different parts of Africa talking about their culture and talking about myths that people in America have about people in Africa. It was such a great show and the fashion OMG it was sooo pretty patterns and beautiful colors everywhere. When I was sitting in the audience I just wanted to get up and snatch those clothes off the models and take them home and wear them all day. My favorite outfits had to be the jumpers with the traditional African patterns but rich bright colors, oh you just had to be there to even imagine what I saw. It was so much fun, I met new people that my friends knew and I seen the hottest Somalian man in my life so cute. (lol had to add that) and just over all --things like this... that I am able to be around and am invited to I am the most luckiest person. It just gives me inspiration to one day maybe possibly travel to these places once in my life. And again it makes me proud to be African American and I think that's the best thing for someone to feel happy about their culture and to see where their ancestors are from It's amazing.

I don't know how to write my emotions that are going through my head right now on this blog but I will try.
what I'm feeling at the moment was the inspiration for my poem. I know this blog isn't suppose to be about my little sob stories and what I feel, but I feel like I need to share it, and I hope I can write this well and if NI do write this well you will understand some of the things in my poem.
Anyway today my day was going good I had a feeling It was not gonna be good all day long but I said what the heck I cant just not go to school or something so I went on to school. So while I'm at my first class, my computer class it's fine (although I wasn't doing none of my work lol) and I get through that class fine and I come home and take a break, but it all started when I got to my next class. Now this is when everything went to hell and my day went down in crumbles. So I get to my next class, and I'm thinking this class is going to be fun today OK my teacher is not here for today and were not doing anything but reviewing for our test. So we all are paired up and the pairs were assigned a chapter, but me...being me I forgot what chapter I was assigned to and what made it worse that I did the wrong chapter I did the review sheet in the morning so I didn't really care so my partner asks me 'did you do the chapter, and he tells me chapter 9 and I'm shocked I tell him I did chapter 8 and everyone in the class room that's there looks at me and says omg Carolyn you did chapter 8 and so I just laugh or try to laugh it off which I do for everything and I know I've messed up but me thinking I can get out of any situation...or try, tried to get out of the situation. So I try to do chapter 9 as  fast as I can before the rest of the class shows up. So I end up finishing the couple of questions but they aren't the best I admit or they were good but they weren't written in depth. So I try to relax. But there is this woman in my class that I'm friends with but she is one of those people who make jokes but is mean too, and is SUCH an over achiever so she gets ti class and sits down and the leader asks her did she do her questions and she says yeah. Idk how she found out I didn't do mine and she looks at me and begins throwing the punches.I mean just harsh punches lol. She says omg I knew you weren't going to do them blah blah blah, so I just laugh it off once again but inside I'm feeling so shitty because I know the reason why I didn't do them was because I procrastinated and didn't care about it and that made me mad because I hate being the stupid one in the class. So the leader has everyone come together to give their answers to the chapters they were assigned and when it got to my chapter I was saying some things but not alot because my partner had better answers then me so I let him explain most of them, he had the page numbers and explained everything so then when he would get stuck the leader would say oh well if your partner would have did her questions she could have gave her answers, "lets ask her" " whats the answer Carolyn" and of course I try to give them the answers that I have and of course there not good enough for them and the over achiever has t say something with her cruel jokes too. So after they embarrassed me in front of the class I was just quite the rest of the time just thinking , and sad because everyone did such a good job and I was the only one who didn't. It made me so discouraged and sad but it also gave me strength to change  how I am and become an "over achiever" ... or maybe not an over achiever or do better than just good aim high.