Boring Day post!

well today is not a particularly fun day today I'm sitting here on my laptop at the moment writing this post and looking out my window that's covered with plastic so the winters breeze wont come through(even though it's winning at the moment) and it looks so gloomy and sad today. So I've decided to stay home from my computer class and do my assignments from home instead of going but around 5 I have to leave to go to my next class to take my final exam and leave, But I also have to make my new schedule for second sem. and I'm hoping they don't stick me with any math. I'm so horrible when it comes to math!
Anyways off of the subject of school-- it seems that  every time I write a post school comes up lol now that tells you how interesting my life is lol!
Yeah but today feels like such a mundane type of day, so OVERLY normal and calm lol! kind of still you know... these types of days I feel so weird kind of like depressed because nothings going on... well not depressed I should say more bored or quite? i don't know...
well I'll talk to you guys (or myself) later lol!
peace&love carolyn!

"choose it" type of music

OK so I wanted to share some music that I have chosen to put on my blog. These are songs that I listen to probably 4 times a week in my ipod! lol. Everyone knows I'm obsessed with Hindi music, and music all over the world! And when I post something I try to put at least 1 song that I have been listening to- to share my love of music. (I feel like I said this before lol)
okay so I know I should do like 8 songs because I haven't done any posts since forever and I feel it will put me back on track so I think that's what I'll do! lol
this is a pic of the songs that are on my itunes that I love my favorite play list!(that I just made today just for this blog)
 Oh yeah I forgot to mention that I love searching online and coming across a song that I have never heard before I love the feeling of finding music from different websites, and blogs, or from other people!
here is one song that I found from looking at fashion videos from a girl who shops at a certain website that I wanted to see, and while looking at the website I found this great song!
song: I GET AROUND JUGGERNAUTS REMIX

 artist: DRAGONETTE

OK so here is my fav. songs itunes play list!

lol as you can see I love Indian music and Nicki Minaj lol

but this isn't the only music I listen to it's the music I listen to every night!

(maybe this says something about me, I have to have been Indian in another life time cause I love everything about India lol)

Random post!@(^_^)@

hello, finally I'm back; and Christmas is dawning upon us! really nothing fun or exciting has been going on in my life recently(typical)but I felt like at least writing something. This is kind of like a free writing because I'm just writing what comes in my head. (lol).
since college is starting to end for me, and everyone is starting to go on break I am going to be working for the winter break so I'm kind of looking forward to it. Well looking forward to the extra cash since I'm running low on that. lol! I really want to fix up my room; it's super small and sometimes I feel that I cant get any inspiration from my room because it's super small, plain, and uninteresting. With the money I plan to get from working I want to decorate my whole room. I've been doing research on what I would like it to look like.  I may post pic's so you can see how small and ugly my room is maybe not though because at the moment it's a total mess.(lol) I cant wait! I want to get a headboard to put candles on as I sleep and books so I can read more often at night which isn't a bad thing; and paint my room maybe a warm color. I'm also thinking about maybe getting wallpaper with the pretty patterns that are black and white. I also want to eliminate as much space as possible because my room is so small. Plan on taking out my dresser and adding nightstands and a vanity stand and pretty storage boxes to put my clothes in for the moment.
But aside from that which is my biggest plan and probably my only plan for the winter (lol) I'm really bored. I've been trying to do more writing in my writing journals to occupy my time but I get so bored easily with it that I find myself ending up laying down listening to music and eating and laying back down and just going to school. I've been trying to find something I can do that's productive but I cant. I really like scrap booking but I find it kinda hard to do (lol) especially with no supplies and no knowledge of what to do and how to do things so I've decided to take up drawing things in my art journal but again found myself becoming bored of that too. Recently I haven't been doing anything in that.
I really want to find a hobby that I can do that I'll have fun doing and can take some time off my hands. I think eventually I'll find something.

Raavan (A. Rai )

The song that I am literally in love with at the moment and I cant stop  listening to and the video is adorable too is Khili Re from the movie Raavan. The melody and the vocals are just so warm and calming and to those who love Hindi movies and music you will love this song and movie its excellent. You have to listen to the song and watch the video and I will assure you that you will definitely want to see the movie.
so here is a link to the video Khili Re:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skeLbK83WSk

The video is so adorable please check it out; you will really love it!

love how Africans have Pride!(culture)

Today is 11/13/2010. Yesterday I went to UIC in Chicago to see my best friend preform and I really wasn't expecting what I saw there. I was so amazed and it made me love even more that I am African American and that deep down I'm happy to have roots in Africa(even if I don't know exactly where in Africa I am from). When I went to this performance there was a fashion show, a DJ, a freestyle(I think that's what the boy was trying to do) and mostly performances from different parts of Africa talking about their culture and talking about myths that people in America have about people in Africa. It was such a great show and the fashion OMG it was sooo pretty patterns and beautiful colors everywhere. When I was sitting in the audience I just wanted to get up and snatch those clothes off the models and take them home and wear them all day. My favorite outfits had to be the jumpers with the traditional African patterns but rich bright colors, oh you just had to be there to even imagine what I saw. It was so much fun, I met new people that my friends knew and I seen the hottest Somalian man in my life so cute. (lol had to add that) and just over all --things like this... that I am able to be around and am invited to I am the most luckiest person. It just gives me inspiration to one day maybe possibly travel to these places once in my life. And again it makes me proud to be African American and I think that's the best thing for someone to feel happy about their culture and to see where their ancestors are from It's amazing.

I don't know how to write my emotions that are going through my head right now on this blog but I will try.
what I'm feeling at the moment was the inspiration for my poem. I know this blog isn't suppose to be about my little sob stories and what I feel, but I feel like I need to share it, and I hope I can write this well and if NI do write this well you will understand some of the things in my poem.
Anyway today my day was going good I had a feeling It was not gonna be good all day long but I said what the heck I cant just not go to school or something so I went on to school. So while I'm at my first class, my computer class it's fine (although I wasn't doing none of my work lol) and I get through that class fine and I come home and take a break, but it all started when I got to my next class. Now this is when everything went to hell and my day went down in crumbles. So I get to my next class, and I'm thinking this class is going to be fun today OK my teacher is not here for today and were not doing anything but reviewing for our test. So we all are paired up and the pairs were assigned a chapter, but me...being me I forgot what chapter I was assigned to and what made it worse that I did the wrong chapter I did the review sheet in the morning so I didn't really care so my partner asks me 'did you do the chapter, and he tells me chapter 9 and I'm shocked I tell him I did chapter 8 and everyone in the class room that's there looks at me and says omg Carolyn you did chapter 8 and so I just laugh or try to laugh it off which I do for everything and I know I've messed up but me thinking I can get out of any situation...or try, tried to get out of the situation. So I try to do chapter 9 as  fast as I can before the rest of the class shows up. So I end up finishing the couple of questions but they aren't the best I admit or they were good but they weren't written in depth. So I try to relax. But there is this woman in my class that I'm friends with but she is one of those people who make jokes but is mean too, and is SUCH an over achiever so she gets ti class and sits down and the leader asks her did she do her questions and she says yeah. Idk how she found out I didn't do mine and she looks at me and begins throwing the punches.I mean just harsh punches lol. She says omg I knew you weren't going to do them blah blah blah, so I just laugh it off once again but inside I'm feeling so shitty because I know the reason why I didn't do them was because I procrastinated and didn't care about it and that made me mad because I hate being the stupid one in the class. So the leader has everyone come together to give their answers to the chapters they were assigned and when it got to my chapter I was saying some things but not alot because my partner had better answers then me so I let him explain most of them, he had the page numbers and explained everything so then when he would get stuck the leader would say oh well if your partner would have did her questions she could have gave her answers, "lets ask her" " whats the answer Carolyn" and of course I try to give them the answers that I have and of course there not good enough for them and the over achiever has t say something with her cruel jokes too. So after they embarrassed me in front of the class I was just quite the rest of the time just thinking , and sad because everyone did such a good job and I was the only one who didn't. It made me so discouraged and sad but it also gave me strength to change  how I am and become an "over achiever" ... or maybe not an over achiever or do better than just good aim high.

BREAKING POINT

I am tired of being seen as the quite shy dumb cute girl,
I'm tired of people not looking up to me but looking at me and saying "shes not as smart as her sisters but at least shes good at...idk some things."
I'm tired of being the only kid in my class not involved and fade into the walls,
I'm tired of working my hardest and not getting recognized for it,
I'm tired at myself for being a procrastinator and doing things at the last minute when I know I shouldn't but I still do the same routines over and over again,
I'm tired of feeling sad and angry at myself when my mom doesn't think I can do great things when she tells me the things that "a mom should tell her kids"
I'm angry at myself for not pushing myself and being an over achiever,
I'm tired of being me...
BUT THIS IS IT!
I'm doing things differently now
I'M going to be the one who does all her work on time and get the top scores in my class,
I'M going to be the one who's going to make it before my sisters
I'M going to be the one my mom looks at and be proud of,
I'M going to be the girl who studies every night pouring over my work and prove people wrong,
I am not going to be known for nothing except as one of the sisters who was the quite cute one...
or maybe I just am upset with myself, maybe I'm unhappy at who I am?, idk...
but what I do know...
things are changing today, I've reached my breaking point.

 Im just making this post because I just made a personilized template of me lol. Im so proud of myself I'm trying really hard to make my blog really intersting and fun for you & me lol.
peace&love, carolyn.

A CELTIC JOURNEY!

So today I awoke at 5:45 in the morning to change my header and went back to sleep at least 2 more time waking up in between sleeps until finally actually falling asleep and staying asleep until my mom opens my door to my little room asking loudly did I have the hair dryer. So now I am awake and now writing this post a few hours later. But what I wanted to talk about was the images and thoughts that were going through my head. I don't know if I was thinking them as I slept  or not which is weird and more confusing but I think I was thinking of these thoughts as I listened to my ipod. That is one thing I love about music when you listen to a certain specific type of song it always gives you a specific type of feeling and that is what happened when I listened to ISLAND by XX.
I have no idea but as I was lying there in my bed all I could think about was Ireland's landscape. And if you like Ireland and have seen the beautiful rich landscape of this country you probably understand exactly what I mean. So I'm lying in my bed and I'm dreaming or maybe just thinking I haven't figured that out yet but I'm seeing water crashing onto these big rocks, and I'm sitting there looking out onto the sea where the water looks so beautiful, and I'm sitting high up on a cliff looking out just speechless, mesmerized by what I was seeing. Then in a instant I am seeing flashes or either flying over Ireland and I'm seeing green!green land, green trees, green grass, rich dark green land.Beautiful! so eventually I end up on this beautiful green grass lying their smiling. It kinda looked like a scene from Twilight where Edward and Bella are sitting in the grass together well but for me minus Edward.lol. so I'm lying there smiling and touching the grass smelling the fresh clean air and loving every minute of it and for some reason all I hear is that song "ISLAND" I don't know why but this is all I can think about and it gives me a happy feeling.So... I lay there in the grass listening to the water crash into the rocks as I'm on the green cliff as I listen to ISLAND.

If you know about XX you are probably in love with them all ready... but if you don't you should definitely listen to them as you read this.  I dont know what it is about XX their dont care type attitude the vocals of the men in the band idk but I love their sound and you should listen to XX's song ISLAND while you read this post then you will understand my short story completely.

(scene from the video Island by XX) 

here is a link to my favorite Ireland landscape video on youtube it's s beautiful!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIg5_JXgZs4

And here is a link to XX video Island on youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PElhV8z7I60

to see the Sahara Desert!To see the people of the veil!(The Tuareg people)

As I was laying in bed I feel into a deep sleep and in that instant came into another life where I was alone and in a place somewhere dark, but for some reason I was not scared but suprisingly I was curious as to where I was; so I stood up and walked foward, and as my vision got clearer I see a figure in robes of indigo blue. As the person came closer it was a man in a gorgeous indigo blue veil wrapped around his face only leaving his eyes uncovered. For some strange reason I got a feeling of butterflies as he took my hand and lead me out of the dark out into the sun and I realized I was in a big tent and his hands were rough and still thin and as he led me I noticed that I was dressed in a long flowing skirt and had beautiful jewlry and henna covering all my fingers. As he lead me out of the tent there were many people dressed like him and I and as my feet touched the hot sand and the blazing heat of the sun touched my face I knew I was somewhere that I have always wanted to be I was sorrounded by beautiful woman as I looked. andalso they were decorated from head to toe in jewlry and henna as I was too. The men were colorful too and were tall and handsome. When he let go of my hand and turned to look at me and I just knew he was familiar but where had I seen this person from? and why was I here?dressed differently from what Im used to and people that look so different from people I know? Then in an instant I knew where I was as my feet became covered in piles of hot sand. I was standing in the Sahara desert where I read about months ago in a deserted library studying pictures of beautiful people and their cultures. I was in West Africa. sourounded by the Tuareg people," the people of the veil", in the Saharan desert, and I was happy.I was home.

So then I wake up and yea Im back in my Chicago room the size of a closet and lying there thinking damn what made me wake up and that is when I see my ipod sitting next to me so the only thing I can do in the dead of night is put those ear buds in my ear and dream some more. and that is exactly what I did!

Hi, my name is Carolyn and I started this blog to share my love of music, cultures, and clothing as you could probably tell in my short story.lol. I wanted to share my experiences that I can probably only dream in my head and also impact other people and get them to share what they love and hear other peoples favorite things( music, cutures, and clothing etc). I feel that music is the only way people around the world can actually sit down and listen to each other no matter what language it is and just smile and be impacted in a beautiful way. music is a way for people who are stressed to relax and look foward to the next day or maybe just the next song in their ipods.lol. but music to me has such a big impact on peoples lives. music can bring people together or start rebellions, and that is part of why I named my blog musicsname because I feel that when I think of music I dont think of music as catagories I think of music as sounds that unite people and places and destinguish one place from another and I find that amazing and over the yrs. I learned alot about different cultures just by the music. That is why I love music and cultures so much and learned to love them both strongly, and of course since Im a girl there isnt one thing that I hate about fashion and beautiful thing which is why I also love clothing and different things that cultures wear. fromtheir shoes, down to the scarves that distinguish someone. And this is my life, this is the only things that make me happy. I think about them 24/7, day and nigh,t when I get up to brush my teeth, to the time Im ready to lie down and listen to my music and its what I will always love!

So hear is my recent findings of music that I have fallin so hard for. It's music by Tuareg people in their native Berber language. I love it so much it puts me in a relazed mood and its just so dreamy one day I would like to go to africa and meet the Tuareg people and hear them sing and the kids play, It would be an honour!

here is a band that is famous and are Tuareg and I love them so much they are called Tinariwen I have already downloaded 3 songs by them they are so good. The first song that I feel in love with was a song called lulla from their album Imidiwan: Companions.  I promise you when your done listening to this song u wont stop your defenitly gonna wanna hear more!